The Angst of August

August and I were adversaries for a few years fallowing the death of my husband. I dreaded its arrival, bringing with it the memory of difficult days battling a terminal illness, first at home, then in the hospital. His life came to an end on the same day the month did. Each year the flip of the calendar page to that last month of summer depressed me.

God freed me from that recurring agony by changing my perspective... He moved me from defensive actions to going on the offensive. I could deliberately counter the onslaught of painful memories by writing activities into those daily calendar squares that I’d look forward to rather than dread. Suddenly August changed from a month of “angst” to one of adventure.

And it worked. I said “Yes!” to going on trips with my kids if the opportunities arose, and if they didn’t, I planned my own excursions to find new breakfast nooks or book a look at little towns in distant locales. Because I now plan to have fun in those 31 days, I do. Not every day has to be filled with activity; it was a new mindset God was after. He set me looking for joy instead of hiding from distress… an action I can choose every day of any month, for that matter.

August and I have come to terms with each other; we’re friends again. I never would have guessed it was possible, but now it’s even one of my favorite months of the year!

Besties! Who knew?!

“So I commend the enjoyment of life, because there is nothing better for a person under the sun than to eat and drink and be glad. Then joy will accompany them in their toil all the days of the life God has given them under the sun.”

(Ecclesiastes 8:15 NIV)

(photo credit: Unsplash/MatthewSleeper) 

A Hug For All Seasons

 

I sent her a ring for no reason but the season she’s in.

 My friend lost her husband recently after a long battle with a form of blood cancer. She’s struggling right now in the initial stages of her loss.

 I know it’s hard. I know it’s lonely. But I want her to know that she’s not alone… no matter how empty the house, how silent her surroundings… or how heavy the weight of her grief.

A favorite song from days gone by was on my playlist this morning, “Alone Again, Naturally”. And although I love the song for old time’s sake, I’ve come to find that in my own experience as a widow, the message is simply wrong… I am not alone.. no matter how loud the voices in my head whisper that it is so.

Funny that right underneath the song on the phone playlist was an ad for an art design studio, and among the offerings was a ring that caught my attention.

I wear a lot of rings. Rather than just pretty baubles on my hand, they are packed with purpose, each one a reminder of a recent experience or bearing a message of some kind or another. So it’s no wonder I was attracted to the two silver “arms” that could wrap around a finger to deliver a hug.

I bought one to send to my friend, knowing it couldn’t replace the hug she was longing for or the two arms she longed to be held in once more. But I wanted her to have a visual reminder of a truth I hope she can come to understand… that she is never alone, even when she finds herself by herself. I pray that the sight of the ring on her finger would envelop her in memories of the life and love she shared with her husband, the love of their family and friends, and especially the constant presence of God, Who, more than any other, loves her so and simply wants her to know.

“Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.”

(Isaiah 41:10 NKJV)